A farewell post.

Hello there!

It's been a glorious two years, and I really appreciate all the support I've gotten over the years!

Although you've witnessed my rather mediocre writing, which just seems to get worse every time I post just on Blogger, I gladly appreciate your time to read what I have to offer! 

I'm going to leave Blogger right after my contest ends in a week or so. To be honest, I just don't feel comfortable on here anymore, and I find myself just hauling my fingers to the keyboard to type. I just don't find it very "me" here and I don't like it. 

I wish the new bloggers the best of luck with their stories, and the old ones a wave goodbye because I've grown attached to them over my two years on here. 

Again, thank you all for the support, especially to my dedicated readers (this seemed longer in my head, oops). I really appreciate it!

I wish you all the best in everything, and will miss you all dearly, 

Cashmere.  

Enemy (Epilogue) (Finale)

So this is almost the end of me as a blogger, since I only have one story left to finish! 


I hope you enjoy this last installment even though I think it's icky. It's been fun writing this story!


Enjoooooooy!
***


I did it.
I did marry him. 


Do I regret it?
Not a single bit. 


The pieces of guilt I'd felt were gone, and he was shedding off his bad skin every single day. He was changing, and I just loved how much of a person he's become. 
He apologized for everything, and I forgave him for everything. Because not forgiving him would benefit no one.  


He did change. That cold Majid was now more "human", in a way. He started to go to dwaniyas, had actual friends, and even reconciled with his parents after our engagement. His parents couldn't be happier. 


Towards me, we did have our small bitter moments, but we'd forget about them in a second. Yet we enjoyed them, and we knew we meant no harm. Confusing but that's a Majid thing. I started to become a bit like him. He was right; I was the key to the change. He's still smart Majid. 


Reem is engaged now to a guy I used to work with. My aunts and mother can't be happier now three girls were not single anymore. 
I sometimes felt Majid tense around Badriya but he soon lightened up when he remembered she had nothing to do with the emails. 








I realized that opposites attract. 
Because my enemy, is now my best friend. 

Enemy (Part 30)

Enjoy!
***


Was I supposed to answer now? I wasn't ready! Never will be! 
Why did he have to put me in a very difficult position?


Wait-why was I thinking and not refusing immediately? I didn't love this person, let alone like him! I hated him! 
Those thoughts were squeezing my brain and almost caused me a freaking migraine. This man was able to do anything, and it scared me. 
What scared me even more was how right he was; he did have a point. If I were to be married to another man, I'd truly be living in guilt because of my and Majid's past together. It wasn't that much of a bad one, but it wasn't a good one either. He'd change his mind about me knowing how I'd treat a man. 


But was I truly the key to changing him? 
Part of me believed I was, and the other part didn't want to believe that part. 


I bit my lip and typed the message. 


I'll think about it. I can't make decisions in my current state. 


There. That did it. 


I opened the door to my office and glanced around, it was nearly four thirty and people were already leaving. I'd might as well stay in my office for the rest of the day. 


I sat back down on the chair and refreshed the page between every millisecond or so. My eyes dilated as soon as I found the bold title indicating an unopened email. 


What surprises me is how you're thinking about it and didn't reject it. 
It'll be for both our benefits, and besides, we both know the burden of being an only child. Er, whatever it is in your case since you have a half-sister. 
Take your time. 
PS. You said on the phone you wanted to see the real me, well guess what? I will show you the real me. 


This was too much. I shut down my laptop and stuffed it in its case, then collected all my items from the desk. I definitely needed time to think. 


*


"Ubai waii chan yeetay? Kan 9ij wanasa!" Reem shouted through the phone, I wrapped the blanket around my cold knees while surfing some online shop I found. 
"Magidart kan 3indi sh'3il," I sort of lied. I didn't know whether to break it to her or not. I needed a second opinion badly. 
"Wai intay w hal sh'3il, mita tkhal9een?" Reem argued. "Oo tara tawich ma bidaitay ya3ni, wayid ga3da ta3been roo7ich w intay a9lan ta3abtay bl jam3a oo,"


This girl just could not shut up, so I figured an easy way to do so. 


"Reem Majid yabi yakh6bni." I said it. There. I said it out loud. 


That truly shut her up, and I could only hear my rising heartbeats, as if my heart was clambering up all the way to my mouth. 


"Reem?" 


"Intay mn 9ijjich?" Oh dear, and this time it progressed to yelling. Plan failed. 
"3ugub kil ili  sawa feech? Maynoona? Ubai moo mn 9ija! La la2 intay mn 9ijich?" 
"Ee, Reem, sa2alni ilyom," I replied with a bored tone. I got my second opinion, a no. 
But Reem didn't know everything that had happened, did she? 
So I had no reason to believe her or anyone else, no one knew about our messages except for Majid and me. 


"Shgltay?" she asked anxiously. 
"Gltla baffakr." 
"Shlon kalamtee?" she asked. I bit my lip, and I knew from that moment I was busted. 
"Okay sim3ay," I took a deep breath and explained to her every single thing; starting from his last text to me as May, and how he hated himself, and then how I pretended to be Badriya (promising her not to tell cousin B) and he revealed himself even further. Of course I couldn't leave out the recent emails with him, and lastly I read out his last message. 


"Umm May, madri shagool. Ya3ni okay wayid ta'3ayar b na'6riti bas still madri. Ya3ni intay t3arfeena akthar mn ay a77ad, fa madri." 


There, those were the words I was looking for, "Intay t3ardeena akthar mn ay a77ad." 


I chewed on my bottom lip and nodded, "Okay, bashoof."
I sighed and said goodbye to my still "traumatized" cousin. 


Majid was still waiting, and I kind of got my second opinion. And I did pray istikhara. I was more than ready to make a decision. 


With the press of a button I was able to compose an e-mail to him. 


Majid, 


I do hope you realize how serious of a matter this is. It determines the future of us both, so I'd rather you not be in a hurry to make such a decision. 
I concur your earlier statement. I do know you better than anyone else. And you I, apart from my cousin Reem, of course. Actually, you do know more of the "inner" me than she does. So yes. you do know me better than anyone else.
I don't care if we're going to bear each other, or maybe even not, but you asked me to change you and I hope that will subdue the tension between us. 


I've come to a decision and it's clear in my head. 
Travel back and I'll say it. 

A confident May.


A pang of both relief and anxiety swung past me, and I left the laptop open on my bed. I continued my online shopping spree and added different bracelets to reward myself for my hard efforts at work. 


My phone buzzed next to me. A message from Reem; I kind of regretted telling her, and hoped she didn't spill anything to anyone. 


Khalti oo 3ami yadroon?:S


She just had to be Reem. 


Nope, let's keep it that way, please. ;)


I returned to my laptop and almost added a cute patterned pink scarf to my cart when Reem decided to send me a text that God knows what she had to reply. Probably another one of her "zaffas".


Please tell me your answer because I'm already in your main living room. :) 
PS. I know you so well that I knew your answer and travelled all the way to YOU. Doesn't that show how serious I am?


M.

Enemy (Part 29)

Don't be too excited now, because I just hate cliches. 


Enjoy!
***


At that moment, I froze. Time did not exist. 
I kept repeating his reply in my head over and over again while the room was spinning around me, figuratively speaking. 


My heartbeats accelerated in dismay, and I found myself staring at the screen without even blinking. My trembling fingers hovered over the keyboard as I sewed sentences in my head. 


Excuse me? 


There, that seemed appropriate. 


A knock on my door startled me and I switched to my screensaver, even though that person was facing the back of my laptop. 


"Istatha May?" a new intern, Taiba said while poking her head through the door. 
"Uhh na3am, 6aiba?" I croaked. Oh dear me, could I be anymore obvious?
"La bas knt bashoof ith akntay mawjooda l2ana bakhth ilmalafat 3ugb rub3 sa3a." 
"Inshallah." I smiled at the girl who could really use a haircut. 


My laptop beeped and I took a deep breath while clicking on the tab. 


Didn't that shock you? I can see that small O forming on your lips right now. Or a capital O. 


And yes, I still do mean it. Let me elaborate:


I just find it fun whenever I'm with you, yes we did have our "afflictive" moments, but that's the only fun I actually have. So did I enjoy it when you were around? Yes. Mostly for the action and what I do to you that I really get a kick out of. 
Call me a sadist. I don't care. Am I trying to change? For the sake of human decency, yes. 


So. Here's how I want to change, and you May, are the key to it. 
Are you ready to read it?
PS. I know the suspense is killing you. ;)


Oh nice, a winking smiley, but he was right...the suspense was killing me. 


Yes, please let's get this over with. I have work to do, as do you. ;) 


I organized the files while waiting for his reply. Gosh he was taking long, and I predicted a very long message. 
And yet a familiar beep...


What's with the winking face? It looks so wrong.


Alright, let's get this started. 
I personally think it's you who made me this way. I fed on your weakness, and you made me crave it. Being your boss was the best thing that ever happened to me, because I had my daily dose every. Single. Day. 
I wanted you to leave because what I get from you is getting out of hand and affecting my own personal life; how I dealt with people, my old friends, and more importantly my parents. 
I hated you for it. 
You made me the disgusting person I am today. 
I did tell you I was a monster back in my last text to you as May, and that was the way I am. Then it dawned on me that it was you who was responsible for it all. 


What I need from you now?
 I need you to undo it all. 


So I was the cause for it all. He just loved being in control, and I let him get too far with my own weakness. 
Did I really cause all of that?


I shook my head in confusion and replied to him. 


Majid, 
I cannot understand all of this. How was I the cause when you didn't control yourself for being the unbearable megalomaniac you are? You chose to be this, and I just happened to be the catalyst of it all. Not my problem. 
Question, it might be a grammatical "error", but how do you blame me now for it all when you stated in your email that you "hated" -past tense- me for it?
"Elaborate", please. 


Oh I was playing it right. I curled my lips in pride and waited. 
Then it beeped. 


Very smart, May.
Where's this fierce, smart girl on the phone? Unleash her. 
I hated you for it because you're not doing anything to me now. So I don't hate you that much. 
Change me, please. 
I don't care that I'm a million miles away, just change me. 


Was he stupid? It meant he travelled for nothing! He initially travelled to change, when the solution was me all along. 


You do realize that means you travelled for nothing, don't you? 
You want the "cure" you come get the cure. I can't do anything. 


Taiba poked her head again and I waved her in, and she gathered the files in silence.
A beep from the computer made me secretly dance in my head. He was right, this was fun. 


Alright then, how do you feel about moving to Nottingham? 


Erm, what?


I don't even know what that place looks like. Surprise kidnap? 


I moistened my dry mouth with my now warm water bottle sitting on the window sill. It tasted of plastic and other cancerous chemicals. Ugh. 


I sighed and opened the newest email from Majid. 


No I was thinking more like surprise engagement, but heck, it's not a surprise anymore is it? 


I choked and spat out my water in bewilderment. 
Oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness! 


WTH? 


I typed. My heartbeats were maniacally unstable, and I still could not digest his last email, let alone my own water.  I gathered my senses while waiting for his reply. 
Did I want to?
Was he serious?
What would everyone think? What would Reem think knowing about his past? 
Oh my goodness. 


I clicked on the mouse speedily, biting my nails anxiously as I read his email. 


I hope you weren't in public reading that... 
Let's set the facts straight here, May. 
I know you well enough to know you'd live in guilt with a different man because of me and what you've been through with me. I mean if he'd look at us now, he'd beat the crap out of the both of us. Whoever he is. 
And myself, well, I don't like to hurt other girls. They don't know me or understand me the way you do; you know exactly what I am. 
You can only change me through this, and I know it. 
So, the question here May is what's your answer?


Oh. My. Goodness. 

Enemy (Part 28)

Hi there!

Again, I'm having a writing contest, all the details are in the previous post!

Enjoy this hopefully action-packed chapter!

Cash.

***

Guilt was seeping through my veins, and tearing my stomach apart. I chewed on my lip in frustration, and tried ignoring the myriad of questions ebbing through my poisonous guilt. 

I pressed on my churning stomach, and hurried to the bathroom to let it all out. I grabbed the sides of the toilet and sat on my knees; I knew I couldn't go on like this, and there was one thing I could do. 

I retreated to my laptop and shakily pressed on the reply buttons. I tried finding the proper words to say what I had to say, and found myself typing, deleting and typing again. It was until forty-five minutes later when I realized that I'd taken too long for a simple email, and realized there was no better way of breaking the news to him. So I settled on this email instead;

Hello, Majid. 

This whole email is hard to write, and I found myself being literally sick because of the guilt I'm feeling. 

There is no "nice" way to say this. I was and still am such a selfish and rude person for doing this to you. I know you weren't nice to me, at all, but you don't deserve this especially since I now know the real you.

You already feel bad about yourself, and now I just made things worse. 

For that I am sorry, I am truly, from the bottoms of my heart terribly sorry. I know you won't forgive me, and I don't expect you to. But I truly am sorry. 

I might've hated you, but now knowing you hate yourself makes me feel a million times worse. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for this and for everything. 

In case my message is still unclear, it was never Badriya talking to you, except for the apology on your phone.

May.

I cursed myself for the flowing tears; why was I this emotional? 

I lied to a guy I hated about my identity and he revealed his true self, so what? 

Maybe it was because he'd trusted her? Maybe because he'd felt more than just good old friendship between them? 

I took three Panadol pills to put me to sleep and to calm my upset stomach. I just wanted the whole Majid quandary to be deleted out of my life; like the whole thing never happened. Like I had never known Majid at all. 

*

I yawned in boredom while checking on the last of the files at the office. My MacBook left a faint and familiar beep, and my stomach quivered again. I opened up the fake Badriya email, and it was just an email of some spa product commercial. 

I googled Nottingham's time zone, and he was awake enough to see his email. He always was. 

The sudden ringing of the phone made me jump a couple of centimeters off my seat, and I quickly laughed it off. I was glad I didn't share my office with anyone, and my company was kind enough to offer a new and young employee her own office. 

"Aloo?" I asked, ignoring the policy of formal company phone greetings.

"3ishtaaw! Ya3ni kubarna?" Reem's loud voice replied. 

"Reem 3indi sh'3il, shtabeen?" I replied curtly. I was just too tired.

"Haday haday, bn6la3 ana oo ilbanat 7ag '3ada 3ugb ildawam, chithi ib sa3a oo ni9, tiyeen?" 

"Umm madri ashoof w agoolich. Ay ma63am?" I was not in the mood for anything social at all. 

"Madri ma 8ararna, akalmhum al7een oo adig 3alaich. Bye!" 

"Bye."

I put the phone down and continued typing on my Macbook, I estimated to be free in about an hour and a half. Maybe I was meant to go out with them. 

The phone rang again, and I was annoyed at Reem for calling instead of texting me the name of the restaurant. 

I picked up the phone, "Na3am Reem?" I groaned in annoyance.

"May?" 

It couldn't be. 

My hands were numb, my tongue was numb, heck my whole body was numb. I almost dropped the phone when I gathered my senses. 

"Majid?" 

"Ee, na3am."

"Uh," I began to say, completely at loss of words. What was I supposed to say to someone I hurt a million miles away from me? 

"Sayvay il7achi 7agi," he said brusquely in a raspy and coarse voice. I'd almost forgotten what he sounded like. "Oo insay ay shay isma i7tiram lama atkallam 3ashan ma tn9admain oo tsz3ileen, oo ham 3ashan ikoon as'hali w ana atkalam."

I pressed my tongue against my cheek to avoid my frown, tears poked at my eyes and he hadn't even started talking. 

"Ma3ay?" he asked.

I cleared my voice, trying to sound impassive, "Ee ma3ak."

"Zain. Intay shnu kntay tfakreen fee bl thab6? Adri ini '3al6an 3alaich, adri. Oo a3tiqid ini 6arasht message shra7tlich kilshay fee, oo inich fahamtay. Bas matwaqa3tich tanzileen chithi.

"Oo lama kalimatni Badriya, ili a3itiqid kanat Badriya, 7asait b awal mara ina fee a7ad agdar agoola shay oo tfham. Oo ana il'3abi 9addagt oo 6ab3an glt kilshay oo f'6a7t nafsi. 9addagtich, May. 9addagtich,

"Darait ina Badriya kha6bha Fahad, w stanast l2ana a7ad khathaha gabl la ana akhthha oo a3awrha. Chithi laish 6arrasht ilemail ili gltaha tnahi kilshay ili kan bainna. Bas madarait inich intay kintay maska ilemail oo trideen."

He paused for a second, and I could hear his rapid breathing. "Laish sawaitay feeni chithi, May? Laish? Lai ba'3ait asan3 nafsi a7ad igooli ma aswa ini a9eer a7san. Laish May?" 

His words sliced through me, leaving me in pieces. I wiped my tears with the back of my hand.

"Majid ana asfa. Lo tadri shkithir ga3da a3ani mn ili sawaita! Ma kan 8a9di 2atheek chithi. Bas kint abi a3rfk inta, ili ma knt itbayna li. Oo 3ugub ma gltli shinu feek ma gdart agoolik ini May. Ila akhr email 6arrashta." I was a complete mess, and I was crying through the phone, sobbing even. What was he doing to me? 

"Itha tabeen t3arfeen mnu ana chan glteeli? Chan glteeli! Al7een shthanb Badriya? Shthanbi ana dakhalteeni b kil hatha?" he yelled. 

"Majid ma kan qa9di!" I repeated myself sternly. "Ana asfa 3ala kil ili sawaita, oo ma aloomk itha matabi tsami7ni, bas please, ana ba3ad njara7t. Oo a7s b thanb kbeer 3ugub ma 3araftk. Lo radli ilyom ili kalamtik fee bl shalaih chan masawait kil hatha," I confessed. 

"Oo lo radlich ilyom ili 3arafteeni feeha?" 

His question caught me off guard, and I froze in place. 

"Chan kammalt a3arfik." 

I gasped and placed a hand over my lips. This time my answer caught me off guard. 

"U-um lazm aroo7," Majid said, obviously shocked at my answer. He hung up immediately, while I was still staring at the wall in front of me, not hanging up. 

I got to my senses and hung up, then checked my phone. Two missed calls from Reem and three messages. They were going to meet up at some new restaurant and I kindly rejected. I returned back to my work and sifted through the endless layers of files laying on my desk. I wiped the last of my tears and continued working. I should never mix business and personal affairs in a single room. Ever. 

The beep indicated a new email and I opened it. I knew who it was from immediately. 

Your answer shocked me. Took me a minute to gather up my thoughts. 

He puzzled me sometimes, he was just too moody and mercurial. I didn't know whether he was kidding around or he was being sarcastic. 

I replied back to him. 

I'd be lying if I said it didn't do the same to me. 

He messaged me instantly. 

And why should I believe you?

Ouch. 

I never said I expected you to. 

I drummed my fingers on the table anxiously. 

Well you don't expect me to forgive you so you have a point there. 

I rolled my eyes at the screen and sent him an equally rude email.

Why are you even talking to me? 

I drummed my fingers on the table again. 

I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it. Talking to you brings you great agony and ergo my pleasure, frankly speaking. 

I couldn't help but laugh. 

Yes I just laughed at that, how is that agonizing? 

I tapped my fingers on the armrest of the chair. 

Weren't you just crying over a minute ago? 

It's strange how much things change over emails. I might call again and enjoy a good old apology from a crying May, huh? 

Ugh. 

No I'll just be laughing at you. Where did you get my digits from anyway?

I sighed and reclined on the chair. 

I have my ways. You're supposed to know me by now. 

What I want, I get. 

What a jerk.

Except for someone. 

He and I both knew exactly who I was talking about.

Stop it. 

And I'm glad she's taken. Unlike you, I don't like seeing her get hurt. 

I have another someone on my mind I'd like to have. 

Oh my goodness. Reem. 

She was everywhere I went. He'd seen her everywhere, and I thought I'd seen him talk to her once at the beach. 

I wasn't going to let him lay his hands on my best friend. 

Who?

I typed just in case. 

You. 

Enemy (Part 27)

Sorry for the wait! :) 
I hope the first day of Ramadan went well, it did for me, il7mdillah! 
I am sort of rushing this story too, so it's going to end soon hopefully.
(Notice: I'm hosting a writing contest, details are on the previous post, thanks!)




Enjoy!
***


Lipstick, check. Mascara, check. Eyeshadow, check. Blush, check. 
I mentally ticked off my short makeup list, and pulled on my black flats -my feet were killing me-. I made one last check at the mirror on my bedroom wall, and I was actually impressed with the final "me" product. 
I facially looked good, and my dark brown hair reached to my mid forearm, As for my weight I was just too skinny, especially in my knee-length black dress. I hoped for good food tonight at Reem's grandmother's house. 


Clutching my purse and phone, I left the house with a loud goodbye and unlocked my car. Of course someone still kept on pestering my head, but I decided to throw it out with the towel once and for all. 


With many twists, turns, honks and of course, mounting amounts of traffic lights, I was at Reem's grandmother's place at eight-fifteen. Fifteen minutes late, and I'm usually the "punctual" type.


I walked through the already open metal gates of the house, then through the granite flooring of the yard and up the stairs to the entrance of the also open door. I made my way through the vast white, classical foyer and inside the overly furnished house. Pink and red mingled with white seemed to be the concentrated colors of the house, something a grandmother would use. 


I continued walking until I followed the sound of Reem's relatives outside the other side of the house, apparently everyone was eating at the buffet. Rows of heated dishes with candles beneath them stood on a long table, forming an L across the garden. I mentally gave myself a pat on the back for wearing flats, because a lot of girls started to sink in the soil with their stilettos. 


"May!" I heard Reem screech, I smiled and gave her a hug. Then she dragged me across by my hand to say hello to her relatives, whom I'd seen before...
Fahad, who was leaning by the door, gave me a small wave and I smiled politely in return. He didn't change at all, same unkempt black hair, semi-tan face and lanky body. 


"Yallah nichbay! Shoofay sh'6i3fich 9aira!" Badriya told me, when ironically she was a tad bit thinner than I was. 
"La oo intay?" I asked her mockingly. She shrugged and tucked her side bang to the side. Her hair literally never changed its height for a long time. At first I suspected it was a wig, but then she told me she'd get her hair cut whenever it grew a whole centimeter at the most. Yet she'd always manage look gorgeous with it, and never got boring at all. 


I added at least eight pieces of wara8 3anab, two sliders, three Caesar's pizzas, and a cheese 9aj. 
"Ya7lailich," Reem's great aunt Salwa said while looking at my plate with a smile. I flushed all shades of red and walked hastily to our table. 


"May tabeen shay tshribeena?" Reem said while tracing the glass rim of her Coke bottle. 
"Umm Sprite, please," I replied. Reem nodded and got up from her chair while taking a sip of Coke.
"Ana gltlich 76ay bas 3ad moo hal kithir," Badriya said while eying my plate. 
I scoffed, "3alay bil 3afya." 
"Baroo7 il7amam digeega, minu biyi ma3ai?" Badriya asked while fixing her hair again. 
"Mali khilg," Shaikha whined, and I pointed at my plate. Badriya huffed while leaving, and was soon replaced by Reem with my Sprite. 
"Thank you!" I said out loud. Khalti Salwa, who was sitting at the table near us, turned at me and smiled. I flushed yet again and chugged my Sprite out of embarrassment just like foreigners did with beer.


The gathering was almost coming to an end, but I truly did have a great time. We spent three hours talking to Reem's girl cousins, who happened to be simply hilarious. Of course, talking and eating from the dessert table. 
One of the girls was actually employed at my previous workplace, the one where Majid was my boss. She told me things were much calmer now that he left, but that didn't mean they were better. I actually thought coming here would make me forget about my little accident with him, but no, Majid was everywhere.  


We said our goodbye's to almost everyone, and I avoided making eye contact with Khalti Salwa. 
"Ma3a ilsalama banat," Fahad told the four of us, Shaikha, Reem, Badriya, and myself once we left the garden -with them holding their heels embarrassingly-. We replied to him and sprinted to our cars from the other three girls' embarrassment of their barefoot dilemma. 


I actually had fun, and it sort of steered me away from what I'd been worried about the day before. All I needed was time. 


*


Five months later,


"May this card for you." the maid said while taking off her slippers by the door of my room. I lifted the laptop off my lap and placed it next to me on my bed, grabbing the white and silver card from the maid's hand.
I still couldn't believe it, and it made me even feel more guilty. 
Yet I couldn't help but smile. 


It was an invitation to Badriya and Fahad's milcha coming up in the next two weeks. A tear of glee bolted down my cheek. Two people I knew and liked. 
The two had met back at the Reem's grandmother's party. Where exactly? 
When Badriya was going to the bathroom. Awkward, but crazy freaky.


I still couldn't actually believe my cousin was engaged, let alone to one of the very few guys I knew. 
My stomach quivered in uneasiness when I remembered the emails between Majid and myself, as Badriya. It didn't feel good at all. 


I placed the card next to my bed, and continued working on my research. I thought about continuing to get my master's degree, but I was just too tired of worrying about grades again. I graduated with a 3.86 grade point average and didn't want my self-esteem to be screwed up. 


My eyes felt droopy, but I just had to continue, work was all I had. I rubbed my eyes and yawned sleepily, placing my head on the headboard behind me. Sleep was winning, and was taking over just like a small dash of poison seeping through me. A small beep from the laptop startled me and woke me up from my almost-going-to-sleep state and I fought the urge to sleep. 


I saved my documents and opened a new page when the beep sounded for a second time. I checked my desktop, it was clear, then I checked my emails. That was clear as well. Then I remembered I had another email registered on my laptop, and that wasn't empty.
Sleep was no longer in my system -panic was. I hovered a shaky finger over the trackpad, contemplating whether I should open the screen or not, and I did (after taking a really long breath)


Badriya,


My greatest congratulations and blessings to you and Fahad, who happens to be one of my very few friends. I knew about this recently, so please pardon my late wish. 


Fahad was almost like the brother I never had, he's a really good guy. I only know you from what I've read from our e-mails to each other, but even so you're a very good-hearted girl. You're both lucky to have each other, and I wish you all the best of luck. 


As of our e-mails, I think we should delete them, don't you think? I mean putting myself in Fahad's shoes, I'm not really sure of my fiancee's emails to my friend. I'm not meaning anything rude here, no. We did nothing wrong, and we both knew our limits. I just don't think Fahad will like it knowing that you and I had long e-mail conversations, so let's just put it all behind us. 
Here's the hard part of this e-mail, If you ever feel like there was anything at all between us, just please ignore it. You're a good girl with a pure heart, he's a very lucky man.


Again, I wish you both the best,
Majid. 


What did I get myself into?

Writing Contest!

Ramadan Kareem, everyone! :)

This is your chance to show me and the rest of the world your writing talents! Think you're up for it? Think your story can win the votes of us all?

(I'm going to bullet point things because everything is easier in bullet points, no?)

What is it about?

-The topic you are going to write about is based on one single emotion; Hope. You can write absolutely anything you want as long as you stick to "hope" and make your story travel around it.

(If it's not about it, I won't be accepting it and won't post it on the blog. I will, however inform you if that happens. Why do I sound like my old principal?)

Word limits:

-A minimum of 500 words and a maximum of 1500 words. 

Deadlines (Submissions and Voting):

-You have one week from now to write and edit everything, no late submissions accepted. (principal reference again) (Deadline: July 28, 4:00 pm) (Submissions are to be sent to my email; cashmerepoison@gmail.com)

-Voting deadline (August 3)

How will this contest work?

-You will send me an email of your submission, and I will post it on my main blog (cashmerepoison.blogspot.com). Readers will vote for their favorite short story by the polls I'll be adding at the side (only works on Blogger web view).

-However, there will be two awards. One from the readers' choice, and the second one from myself. Meaning I get to choose my own personal favorite. 

Submissions:

-Send me your submissions on my email (cashmerepoison@gmail.com) with:

Your name, the title of your short story, twitter username (optional) and last but not least, your story! 

Winners:

- Winners will be determined by the number of votes the contestant's story gets, of course. 

- Again there'll be two winners. One winner of the people's choice, and the other one of my own choice (because we all hate being underrated/estimated).

-Winners will be announced when voting week is over and will be permanently on my blog, unlike other entries which will be unfortunately deleted off my blog.

Other stuff:

-Non-fiction entries are not accepted. 

-Keep it at the most PG-13, people. It's Ramadan, for crying out loud!

-No harsh commenting on submissions unless it's constructive crit., but it's going to be a bit late for that...

-I'll accept poetry. 

-Only English submissions are accepted. (Bits of m3arrab is fine)

-Have fun and happy writing!

Yes, khaba 3umri and I admit. Haaa! But honestly, I am looking forward to your writings! 

May the odds be ever in your favor,

Cashmere.